Waiting on the Fatwa...
Intrepid SACSTW reporters have AGAIN uncovered the truth in another story of supposed "atrocities" in Afghanistan. This time, the calm, peaceful, tolerant people of Afghanistan have their burqas in a bunch over the light toasting of a couple of Korans by American forces.
This is a simple cultural misunderstanding. American forces are an outdoorsy bunch. They like to relieve themselves outdoors: "USMC Yellow 'Rain' of Terror Conspiracy Exposed" and they like to camp.
This time they decided to have a hootenanny to foster good will with the Afghani people . And what good hootenanny doesn't have a campfire? They planned on singing Islamic campfire favorites such as: "She'll be Blowing up the Mountain When She Comes" and "Boom By Ya" and they decided to cook dinner over the campfire.
They purchased halal hot-dogs. (100% beef, no pork, blessed by the local Imam) They even had smores! The problem arose when the campfire wasn't hot enough to cook the hot-dogs. A "Native American" soldier informed everyone that the hottest campfires were fueled by bull sh!t (BS). Non-"Native American" soldiers misunderstood and understandably tossed a couple of Korans on the fire.
Once the misunderstanding was resolved, the Korans were retrieved from the fire. Apparently the Afghanis, after sewing up the vagina of a 12 year old girl and beheading a couple of homosexuals, decided that this was a affront to their moral code. The images below illustrate their measured and completely reasonable response:
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Dear Leader Obama sent a three page letter of grovelling to Afghan President Karzai, but even better was this video apology by SACSTW favorite Kira Davis. As Americans, Sahib and The Crew are appalled that our president didn't accurately portray the depth of our contrition. Kira sums it up perfectly.
We expect the fatwa any day now...
UPDATE: Just heard that Andrew Breitbart died last night. Our thoughts and prayers are with his family.
"She'll Be Blowing Up The Mountain When She Comes"
ReplyDeleteNow that's funny right there, I don't care who you are...... Git-r-done !
Thanks Kenny! I was kind of partial to "Boom By Ya".
ReplyDeleteKenny, agreed....very clever. Fatwa there's no stinkin' fatwa... (i think) Or if there is, I hope you don't have to go before that Judge in PA. There's a whole another post.
ReplyDeleteLaurel,
ReplyDeleteIt's OK as long as we don't dress up as a zombie Mohammed!