Dude, Where's My Lesbian?

So I am sitting at my desk today, trying to decide what to do for lunch.  Then I remember about National Kiss A Lesbian day being today down at Chick-fil-A.  I think to myself, "Crew, that chicken sandwich you had on Wednesday in support of the U.S. Constitution was dang good, how about another one today".  Then it hits me.....what with this whole kiss a lesbian thing going on, I can have lunch AND scratch something off my bucket list all in one fell swoop!

So I get all excited over my prospects at Chick-fil-a, I mean I've got images swirling around in my head that frankly make it hard to concentrate on driving.  You know, like this......

I finally get there, and nothing!  Nary a lesbian to be found.  I go back to my car, squeeze into my Lillith Fair '98 T-shirt, and crank up the Elton John CD.  I figure when the lesbians show up, I'll be first in line for a kiss.  Thirty minutes go by, then sixty.  I got nothing.  Actually, that's not true.  I had a lovely conversation with this guy....

but we decided to just stay friends.  After wasting my whole lunch hour, I go into the Chick-fil-a to complain to the manager.  He is sympathetic, and says that he was told the lesbians weren't going to show until that evening.  Evidently, they were all up late last night watching the Olympics.  Diving, I suppose.