Oh Mitt... You Missed the Kill Shot!

The president made many vague, muddled, outright false, and generally laughable statements last night.  Among them are:

• Apparently not realizing that US marines STILL use bayonets.  Something you would think the commander-in-chief might be aware.
• Talking about Tunisian protests our narcissist-in-chief said, "This nation. Me."
• Emphatically and categorically stating that Romney was against ANY form of government assistance for GM and Chrysler.  Oops, sorry Mr. President... wrong or lying again:  http://www.nytimes.com/2008/11/19/opinion/19romney.html?_r=2&
• Espousing a level of love and adoration for Israel that he usually reserves for tax increases, new entitlement programs, and golf.
• (And one of my favorite moments) Not correcting Bob Schieffer when Bob referred to him as Obama Bin Laden.
• Trying to explode Romney's brain with the Obama Death Stare, a la Scanners/Big Bang Theory.

All fascinating and enjoyable moments, but Romney could have won the debate and probably the election in one fell swoop.  The president gave him the perfect opening and Romney could have poleaxed (for you race baiters out there, that was pole axed and not poll taxed) him right there on national TV.  If he had taken the opportunity, I wouldn't have been surprised to see Obama curl up in the fetal position right there on stage and start sobbing for Reggie to come save him.  Here is how the exchange SHOULD have happened:

• President Obama:  Bob, let me — let me respond. You know, if we're going to talk about trips that we've taken, you know, when I was a candidate for office, first trip I took was to visit our troops.  And when I went to Israel as a candidate, I didn't take donors, I didn't attend fundraisers, I went to Yad Vashem, the — the Holocaust museum there, to remind myself the — the nature of evil and why our bond with Israel will be unbreakable.
• Governor Romney:  Really Mr. President?  You have must have immense testicular fortitude to introduce fundraising into this discussion. Well, you went there so here goes. Yes, as a CANDIDATE I did attend fundraisers in Israel.  You know why?  Because people there LIKE me and understand I will be a TRUE friend to Israel as president.  Would you like to know what I will NEVER do as PRESIDENT?  I will never attend a fundraiser when the bodies of our ambassador and three other citizens are not even cold and that they are dead as a direct result of my administration's failures.  That, Mr. President, I will never do.  Bob, please feel free to clean up that puddle of goo that used to be the president.  I wouldn't want anyone to get it on their shoes.

That, to quote Barney Stinson, would have been, wait for it.... LEGENDARY!